good news, bad news

Cooking has become my outlet for grief. My grandpa passed away last week, and I have since made lemon ricotta pancakes, tomato basil frittata, a bean and cheese casserole, a huge batch of oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, and Super Bowl spicy bean dip. My kitchen has been a madhouse, but I've been keeping my shirts nice and clean thanks to the wonderful gift my sister sent me. Happy early, early birthday to me!I assure you, the jealousy you are experiencing is completely normal.

Thanks to delicious food in my belly and the support of my lovely friends, I'm feeling much better. The funeral is in two weeks - I am already preparing lots of yummy treats and comforting meals to get me though it.

new least favorite.

"I hate with a bitter hatred the names of lentils haricots -- those pretentious cheats of the appetite, those tabulated humbugs, those certified aridites calling themselves human food!"
George Robert Gissing, English novelist (1857-1903)

I couldn't agree more. Don't think I haven't tried lentils - I shudder at the name - for I have! What possessed me to buy them in bulk at Henry's, I'll never know, but I ended up with 2 cups of dry lentils in my possession that I cooked in different recipes over the last couple of months. I've had cold lentil salad, lentil soup, and most recently, rosemary-scented lentils and sausage. This was a promising undertaking; hot, sweet Italian sausage, rosemary leaves, onions, carrots, garlic, all mixed in with those strange, flat beans. Browning the sausage and simmering the vegetables in broth along with the lentils, the spicy, herb-y smell made my mouth water. But, when it came time for me to taste my finished product, I'm going to be completely honest with you.

It looked like poop.

I couldn't even eat more than one serving! It was mind over matter all the way. The savoriness (is that a word?) of the sausage was not enough to save the earthy mush from bringing a frown to my face with every bite. I had to dump out half of my lunch at work. The worst part is, I still have 2 tupperwares full of the stuff at home! I hate being wasteful - especially after the Turkey Enchilada Pie disaster - but I just can't bring myself to eat it.

So, lesson learned: I don't do lentils. Here's hoping the tuna & artichoke melts I made for lunch will make my lentil fiasco a distant, unpleasant memory.

EDIT: The melts were fabulous! Definitely keeping them in the permanent recipe collection of awesomeness.

home life

The homebody lifestyle seemed really appealing this weekend, so I started my eating in project a little early. On Thursday, I made Weight Watchers' Turkey Enchilada Pie with plans to freeze leftovers for the rest of the week. Unfortunately, my poor, sensitive little taste buds couldn't handle the meager 4 ounces of jalapeno peppers. The spiciness overpowered the rest of the dish. Even a generous dollop of sour cream couldn't help! So either I will try to pawn it off on my roommate (Jon found it too spicy as well) or it will go in the garbage. Sad waste of food, but now I know better. Next time, no jalapenos!

I also made buttermilk biscuits from scratch. It's a nice feeling putting all the ingredients together, sticking it in the oven and having it come out recognizable. I mean, these look like biscuits, right?

They were good, too. I accidentally made one more than the recipe called for, and the biscuits were a little flat, but still yummy, and I'm not the only one who thought so. Unlike my disastrous low-fat brownies (can't find the recipe online and wouldn't want to share it with you anyway!), Jon actually found these edible and delicious. Yay, me!

This morning, I made lemon ricotta pancakes. I was supposed to make them with my friend Megan, but circumstances being what they are with my family, I had to postpone. So I practiced today after being a good girl and going to the gym. They were DIVINE.

Colorful mixing bowls makes breakfast even more fun.

Any recipe requiring melting butter on a hot pan is A-OK with me.

Ta-daaah!

These didn't last long. And the best part: I couldn't possibly eat them all, so I get to freeze the rest for later. This will be a tasty week.

unprepared

It's always too soon.

Project Dine In

Hello, my little neglected corner of the blogosphere. I'm revisiting you to make an announcement: I, Jennifer Driver, will not be dining out for the entire month of February. This includes restaurants, coffee shops, fast food, and (sob) El Zarape. Inspired by Cathy at Not Eating Out in New York, my goal is to save money (approx. $100) and eat more healthfully by cooking my own meals. It will be tough; as I was discussing last night with my friend Sarah, most social gatherings take place over dinner or coffee. For some reason, we gravitate toward making food the center of our get-togethers, whether we are catching up with friends or celebrating a birthday. But dining out is expensive and not as intimate as preparing and eating a meal together, or taking a walk or visiting a museum. One of my goals in this project is to redefine the way my friends and I spend time together.

To make sure I don't go crazy cooking alone in my tiny apartment kitchen, I am enlisting my friends and boyfriend to support my cause. Sarah and I already have plans to cook dinner together, and Jon has offered to pay for ingredients if I will whip him up something meaty and fabulous from Julia Child's famous cookbook. I also have plans for a grand kitchen-stocking shopping spree this weekend; I've been drooling over SUPER cheap casseroles at Amazon, mini muffin tins at Target, and loaf pans & a grill pan at IKEA. Hopefully I will remember to take pictures, even though my food doesn't always come out pretty and my standard point-and-shoot camera wasn't made for taking blog-worthy pictures. I just love when blogs have pictures, it looks more interesting.

I'm kicking off my journey February 1st, after a "last supper" at the Waterfront Grill in Nat'l City with Joyce this Friday. Wish me luck!

hello, 2010.

I can feel the change coming. What a wonderful feeling!

I quit my 2 jobs.
I'm starting a new one next week that will help me take the load off my parents, and hopefully won't drive me completely crazy in the process.
I'm still applying to schools while I wait to hear back from sac state...thanks to budget cuts, they have to wait til their department gets its allocations before sending out letters. Really, an e-mail wouldn't hurt, but I guess they prefer to do things the old-fashioned (and expensive) way.
I ran 12 MILES today! In three weeks, I will run my first half-marathon ever!
WW has been a huge success - it's getting easier to eat healthy and take care of myself. At this point I don't care how much weight I've lost, I'm just thankful for the lifestyle change and confident that I won't go back to my old habits.

Alas, change isn't always good...

Jon leaves for med school in 8 months. Not much to say about that.
This year, my brother turns 16 and my sister turns TWENTY. I am not liking this at all.
My grandpa has brain cancer. Luckily, it's treatable, but still. It's brain cancer and I'm terrified. What a lovely way to start the new year, yeah?

Still I'm staying positive - "Keep Calm and Carry On" is my new motto.

refuse to excuse

Some things just really burn me up.

This morning, I was ringing up two regular customers, a really nice guy and girl who work close by, and they were chatting as I was taking their order. The woman says to her colleague, "Yeah, that project really raped me," then turns to me and says, "Excuse my language," and carries on with her conversation. I had to turn away quickly, under the guise of pouring their coffee, so I wouldn't say one of the million things running through my mind, not one of them being, "Oh sure, you're excused." No, I will NOT excuse you for casually dropping the term "raped" into your conversation. 2 years of involvement in the Vagina Monologues and personally knowing rape victims has taught me better. I only wish she (yes, she - can we get back to that? Talk about girl-on-girl violence.) had the faintest idea of what that term means to millions of women. I doubt she would be able to use it so nonchalantly.

Excuse me while I step off my soapbox.

In other news, life trudges along, guided by little lanterns of hope in the shape of a cup of tea and good book at the end of the day, or weekly TV dates with Jonathan, or the biggest light of all, my family. In one week I will be flying home to be with them for 5 whole days, celebrating Thanksgiving and my mom's 50th birthday. That's been enough to get me through some really tough moments in the last week. When I get down, I just put Harry Connick, Jr. on my iTunes and fast-forward to the day after Thanksgiving, when my brother, sister, and I will help my mom and Dennis put up Christmas decorations. We will venture with flashlights into the cavernous depths of our closet under the stairs with its sloping roof and awkward angles, pulling out boxes of ornaments, lights, wreaths, and garlands. We will laugh at our first-grade attempts at art, the hand-print wreaths, the popsicle-stick picture frames. Yet, those will inevitably end up on the tree, right next to fragile glass snowflakes that could've come from a Pottery Barn catalog. It's the hodgepodge of home-made, inside joke, and elegant ornaments that make our tree so special.

Plus, we will get to bake some DELICIOUS holiday treats. I'm trying to convince my sister that WW cookies are just as good as the Pillsbury kind, but she has yet to see the potential for greatness that is applesauce. I will make her see the light!